Friday 15 March 2013

Waiting for Gonzo 'Tache Tour - Dave Cousins' Top 10 Moustaches!

I absolutely loved Dave Cousins' debut novel 15 Days Without A Head when I read it last year (read my review here) so I couldn't wait to get my hands on his latest novel Waiting for Gonzo. This is another fabulous story and one I'd highly recommend (my full review was posted earlier today). To celebrate the release of Waiting for Gonzo I'm thrilled to welcome Dave to the blog today with a fantastic guest post about his Top Ten Moustaches. Before I hand over to Dave though I want to tell you a bit more about the book:

Meet Oz . . . he's got a talent for trouble but his heart's always in the right place (well, nearly always).

Uprooted from his friends and former life, Oz finds himself stranded in the sleepy village of Slowleigh. When a joke backfires on the first day at his new school, Oz attracts the attention of Isobel Skinner, the school psycho - but that's just the beginning.

After causing an accident that puts his mum in hospital, Oz isn't exactly popular at home either. His older sister's no help, but then she's got a problem of her own . . . one that's growing bigger by the day.

Oz knows he's got to put things right, but life isn't that simple, especially when the only people still talking to you are a hobbit-obsessed kid and a voice in your own head!

Packed with action, heart and humour, Waiting for Gonzo takes you for a white-knuckle ride on the Wheel of Destiny as it careers out of control down the Hillside of Inevitability. The question is, do you go down laughing? Or grit your teeth and jump off?

Visit Dave Cousins' website for more information

Now please give a very warm welcome to Dave!


Waiting for Gonzo ’Tache Tour! 
Top Ten Moustaches and One Red Nose …
by Dave Cousins

When Oz draws a moustache on a photograph in Waiting for Gonzo, he does it because he thinks it’s funny. Moustaches are funny – end of story. So, when I found out that the Gonzo ’Tache Tour would be at Feeling Fictional on Red Nose Day, I thought what better way to celebrate than with a chart of Top Ten ’Taches!

It’s quite a tricky task when you get down to it. A quick search comes up with all the usual suspects: Hulk Hogan, Hitler, Hagar the Horrible (does your name have to start with an H to sport some lip hair?) Historically, most of the royals had at least some facial hair too, except Victoria – but then how close did those portrait painters really get? But you don’t want those old soup-sievers do you? You want something new, something original, something you haven’t seen before …

Well, I can’t promise any of the above, but here is a list of a few inspiring moustaches and their stories, to give you an idea of how this little piece of face fur has influenced the world – not just the life of a teenage boy!

© Dave Cousins 2013

At number ten – Me! What do you mean, it’s fake? Plus, I get double points for having a red nose and anyway, it’s my chart.

Credit: AP / AP / Press Association Images

Number nine, so fine – Groucho Marx. I loved the slapstick and witty one liners of the Marx Brothers films when I was growing up. Of all the moustaches in the world, Groucho’s must rank as one of the most famous. It even spawned the classic popular comedy disguise set of bushy eyebrows, glasses, a large plastic nose, and of course – a moustache!

Looking great at eight – The Thompson Twins – two for the price of one! I was a big Tintin fan as a kid and spent a lot of time dragging a stuffed Scottie dog around on a piece of string. Anyone I encountered with a moustache immediately became one of the Thompson Twins in my alternative reality. Given this was the 1970s (A Golden Age of the moustache) I ran into them a lot.

Credit: Ron Wolfson / Landor / Press Association Images

Seven – The Magnum PI or Tom Selleck – this piece of face fuzz is so famous it has become synonymous with the moustache.

Credit: dpa-Film Peter Mountain/DPA/Press Association Images

Sneaky tricks at Six – So can a moustache EVER really be cool? Well, yes – yes it can. But only if coupled with a big old beard – and it helps if you’re a pirate. Blackbeard (admittedly, he wasn’t called black ’tache, but hey …) kept fireworks in his facial hair and lit them to scare his enemies. Johnny Depp looked ace, if a bit camp, in Pirates of the Caribbean. Even Lovejoy (Ian McShane for those of you too young to remember the antique-selling sleuth) looked pretty cool in that!

Credit: AP / AP / Press Association Images

Five alive – What is it about artists and facial hair? But then maybe the idea of walking round with a neatly trimmed and waxed clump of hair stuck to your top lip IS fairly surreal. So … to the King of the Weird and Wonderful … Mr Salvador Dali.

Credit: Chris Pizzello /AP / Press Association Images

1-2-3-Four! – Music plays an important part in Waiting for Gonzo, and the annals of rock history provide plenty of ’taches to choose from. Jimi Hendrix and Prince, both worked a straggler, but still managed to look kinda cool. Sgt. Pepper era Beatles had some impressive nose frills going on and we shouldn’t forget Lemmy from Motorhead. But the best one has to be Frank Beard, the drummer from ZZ Top – who despite his name, was the only member of the band NOT to have a beard. He made up for it with a pretty impressive nose rug though.

Three is the Magic Number – In honour of Gonzo, I had to include a Muppet in the list. Waldorf – one half of the curmudgeonly duo Waldorf and Statler – has a fine snowdrift ‘tache, but in the end he had to make way for Swedish Chef, whose moustache/eyebrow combo are just hilarious.

Two – The Fu Manchu – partly because it rhymes(!) but mostly because it deserves a place in any list of top ’taches. The Fu Manchu is even a category in the World Beard and Moustache Championships. ( However, did you know that in the original Fu Manchu stories by Sax Rohmer, the character Fu Manchu did not have a moustache? He first appeared with facial hair in the 1923 film The Mystery of Dr Fu Manchu and never shaved again!

Credit: Tim Ireland/PA Archive/Press Association Images

And finally, perching on very top of this tickly totem of ’taches, the One that first nudged the Wheel of Destiny into motion for Oz in Waiting for Gonzo – Marcel Duchamp’s piece of art terrorism on a postcard of the Mona Lisa. He said he did it because he wanted to change people’s perception of what art could be. He was lying. He did it because it was funny. Moustaches are funny. End of Story. Or is it in fact, just the beginning …?

Thank you to Feeling Fictional for agreeing to host this farcically furry leg of the Waiting for Gonzo ‘Tache Tour. Find out more about Waiting for Gonzo at


Thanks for stopping by with such a fabulous guest post Dave! That's a fab pic with your fake moustache & I'm glad to see you have your red nose ready for tonight too :o) Since it is Red Nose Day and we're all supposed to do something a little silly I thought I'd join in with a 'tache pic, I don't have any fake moustaches at home though so I had to improvise!

So which of Dave's top ten moustaches is your favourite? Are there any 'taches that he's left off his list that you would have included in yours? What are your plans for Red Nose Day?

Don't forget to check out the rest of the Waiting for Gonzo 'Tache Tour stops below:

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